Comments on: Anna Ternheim – Halfway to Fivepoints / Coping Strategies for the Broken Hearted… http://keane.festizio.net/2009/02/02/anna-ternheim-halfway-to-fivepoints-coping-strategies-for-the-broken-hearted/ my life through music Wed, 24 Feb 2010 19:54:41 -0800 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9.2 hourly 1 By: inFESTIZIO | my life through music http://keane.festizio.net/2009/02/02/anna-ternheim-halfway-to-fivepoints-coping-strategies-for-the-broken-hearted/comment-page-1/#comment-5168 inFESTIZIO | my life through music Wed, 30 Dec 2009 04:04:17 +0000 http://keane.festizio.net/wordpress/?p=68#comment-5168 [...] Starting the year with heartbreak, the kind that feels like it’ll consume you forever. I used to wonder if I could ever feel [...] [...] Starting the year with heartbreak, the kind that feels like it’ll consume you forever. I used to wonder if I could ever feel [...]

]]> By: Melanie http://keane.festizio.net/2009/02/02/anna-ternheim-halfway-to-fivepoints-coping-strategies-for-the-broken-hearted/comment-page-1/#comment-159 Melanie Fri, 06 Feb 2009 18:48:00 +0000 http://keane.festizio.net/wordpress/?p=68#comment-159 I agree with Suki in that I believe you can be happy with many people. I believe that there are certain people who seem like they're perfect for you but if you look down the road 5 years from now, will they still be perfect for you? Maybe, maybe not. I also don't believe in this perfect concept. Everyone has flaws...perfection is an illusion. A great line from Sabrina is when Fanny Ardent's character tells Sabrina (Julia Ormond) that illusions are dangerous people because they have no flaws. <br/><br/>Out of the 3 "loves of my life", I've been able to move on and find happiness while still loving how I felt in that relationship. I look back on them fondly but by no means do I still feel pain that it didn't work out. <br/><br/>I've always been a dreamer but the older I get the more I realize that reality is much better...because it's tangible. I agree with Suki in that I believe you can be happy with many people. I believe that there are certain people who seem like they’re perfect for you but if you look down the road 5 years from now, will they still be perfect for you? Maybe, maybe not. I also don’t believe in this perfect concept. Everyone has flaws…perfection is an illusion. A great line from Sabrina is when Fanny Ardent’s character tells Sabrina (Julia Ormond) that illusions are dangerous people because they have no flaws.

Out of the 3 “loves of my life”, I’ve been able to move on and find happiness while still loving how I felt in that relationship. I look back on them fondly but by no means do I still feel pain that it didn’t work out.

I’ve always been a dreamer but the older I get the more I realize that reality is much better…because it’s tangible.

]]> By: suki http://keane.festizio.net/2009/02/02/anna-ternheim-halfway-to-fivepoints-coping-strategies-for-the-broken-hearted/comment-page-1/#comment-158 suki Tue, 03 Feb 2009 04:45:00 +0000 http://keane.festizio.net/wordpress/?p=68#comment-158 i believe that there is more than one person out there for us. and that there is the time and place for the "romantic" connection to occur. the connection of souls will be happen regardless of romantic involvement. <br/><br/>to truly let go is to truly love. self-preservation is just a step in coping and learning. i believe that there is more than one person out there for us. and that there is the time and place for the “romantic” connection to occur. the connection of souls will be happen regardless of romantic involvement.

to truly let go is to truly love. self-preservation is just a step in coping and learning.

]]> By: Anonymous http://keane.festizio.net/2009/02/02/anna-ternheim-halfway-to-fivepoints-coping-strategies-for-the-broken-hearted/comment-page-1/#comment-157 Anonymous Tue, 03 Feb 2009 02:35:00 +0000 http://keane.festizio.net/wordpress/?p=68#comment-157 Distance + Time = Healing Distance + Time = Healing

]]> By: Keane http://keane.festizio.net/2009/02/02/anna-ternheim-halfway-to-fivepoints-coping-strategies-for-the-broken-hearted/comment-page-1/#comment-156 Keane Mon, 02 Feb 2009 20:44:00 +0000 http://keane.festizio.net/wordpress/?p=68#comment-156 Limiting expectations is definitely hard to do. Learning to live with yourself and being more self-sustainable is a huge showing of maturity on your part. Limiting expectations is definitely hard to do. Learning to live with yourself and being more self-sustainable is a huge showing of maturity on your part.

]]> By: j http://keane.festizio.net/2009/02/02/anna-ternheim-halfway-to-fivepoints-coping-strategies-for-the-broken-hearted/comment-page-1/#comment-155 j Mon, 02 Feb 2009 20:40:00 +0000 http://keane.festizio.net/wordpress/?p=68#comment-155 After my boyfriend of five years dumped me, I spent two entire months sitting in my house, crying all day, every day. Every once in awhile, two years later, I still miss him bad enough to cry all day, again. I don't pretend to know how to cope in a productive way. But if I cry enough, eventually I'm too exhausted to cry anymore.<br/><br/>The best point anyone ever made to me (my mother, actually) was that I was mourning the death of a dream. No, we wouldn't get married and have 2.5 lovely children. No, he would never quite have the same goals I hoped he would. <br/><br/>And she was right. Things had not been right for awhile, but I thought we could work through it. When I thought about it, I realized I didn't miss what we'd become: I missed the delirious, dizzying love we'd had in the first three years, and what I thought that meant. I don't miss the person he was at the time of the breakup/is now, and I don't miss the way I felt in the end. I miss the security...but I can provide that for myself now. <br/><br/>Which doesn't help the brokenhearted at all right now...but someday it might.<br/><br/>Much love to my friend who is suffering. Am thinking about you. After my boyfriend of five years dumped me, I spent two entire months sitting in my house, crying all day, every day. Every once in awhile, two years later, I still miss him bad enough to cry all day, again. I don’t pretend to know how to cope in a productive way. But if I cry enough, eventually I’m too exhausted to cry anymore.

The best point anyone ever made to me (my mother, actually) was that I was mourning the death of a dream. No, we wouldn’t get married and have 2.5 lovely children. No, he would never quite have the same goals I hoped he would.

And she was right. Things had not been right for awhile, but I thought we could work through it. When I thought about it, I realized I didn’t miss what we’d become: I missed the delirious, dizzying love we’d had in the first three years, and what I thought that meant. I don’t miss the person he was at the time of the breakup/is now, and I don’t miss the way I felt in the end. I miss the security…but I can provide that for myself now.

Which doesn’t help the brokenhearted at all right now…but someday it might.

Much love to my friend who is suffering. Am thinking about you.

]]> By: Keane http://keane.festizio.net/2009/02/02/anna-ternheim-halfway-to-fivepoints-coping-strategies-for-the-broken-hearted/comment-page-1/#comment-154 Keane Mon, 02 Feb 2009 20:30:00 +0000 http://keane.festizio.net/wordpress/?p=68#comment-154 Agreed, Mr. Kaminski. Release from attachment is key to being free. Agreed, Mr. Kaminski. Release from attachment is key to being free.

]]> By: cjkaminski http://keane.festizio.net/2009/02/02/anna-ternheim-halfway-to-fivepoints-coping-strategies-for-the-broken-hearted/comment-page-1/#comment-153 cjkaminski Mon, 02 Feb 2009 20:28:00 +0000 http://keane.festizio.net/wordpress/?p=68#comment-153 My experience taught me that the central teachings of buddhism contain the seeds of great wisdom, for most human suffering comes from our desire to experience reality different than it is.<br/><br/>Mending a broken heart is the most profound exercises in becoming okay with a portion of reality that is no longer within your sphere of influence. My experience taught me that the central teachings of buddhism contain the seeds of great wisdom, for most human suffering comes from our desire to experience reality different than it is.

Mending a broken heart is the most profound exercises in becoming okay with a portion of reality that is no longer within your sphere of influence.

]]> By: Anonymous http://keane.festizio.net/2009/02/02/anna-ternheim-halfway-to-fivepoints-coping-strategies-for-the-broken-hearted/comment-page-1/#comment-152 Anonymous Mon, 02 Feb 2009 19:32:00 +0000 http://keane.festizio.net/wordpress/?p=68#comment-152 I always believe that whole spiel about how if you truly loved someone, you would be able to let them go. I mean the initial feelings are usually anger, sadness, etc.. the typical emotions, but after the initial hurt, my mind is always rationalizing. <br/><br/>1. yes, you can't help who you love 2. you can't force someone to feel something they don't. <br/>3. if you really loved them, you'd want them to be happy. <br/>4. it's easier for me to love someone than hate someone even if they break my heart. <br/><br/>- poo I always believe that whole spiel about how if you truly loved someone, you would be able to let them go. I mean the initial feelings are usually anger, sadness, etc.. the typical emotions, but after the initial hurt, my mind is always rationalizing.

1. yes, you can’t help who you love 2. you can’t force someone to feel something they don’t.
3. if you really loved them, you’d want them to be happy.
4. it’s easier for me to love someone than hate someone even if they break my heart.

- poo

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